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The Oscars love your boobs

Posted by emzkbd on February 24, 2013

I’m no Joan Rivers, but I think I can be a little smart and snarky. If only I had my own show! Here’s how it works: I break down the best and worst dressed celebrities on the Oscar’s red carpet with pics, compliments of People.com. I’ve created some of my own unique categories to including Most Unconventional because something always stands out from the crowd.

BEST DRESSED LIST

Jennifer LawrenceBest Dressed: Jennifer Lawrence. Ok, so maybe it was the obvious choice, but it was effortlessly elegant! She looks healthy since her bout with pneumonia, and she looks so chic. I love the fitted bodice and the perfectly voluminous pouf of the skirt. Usually the jewel tones win me over and the nude/white/blush shades makes me roll my eyes, but Jennifer looks like a vision in pale pink. So sophisticated and Oscar-worthy! And we haven’t seen her boobs, as Seth McFarlane pointed out—on or off the red carpet.

Olivia MunnMost Glamorous: Olivia Munn. I missed her walk the red carpet, and not because of her bold choice of color. This chick is totally fit, and the corset with gold stitching hugs her curves like lingerie. I love the draping, which normally would make me complain about too much fabric, but instead its satiny sheen makes it appear totally touchable.

Naomi WattsMost Unconventional: Naomi Watts. Not only is the color and sparkle outstanding, but the fit is flawless. And of course, the whole reason it’s unconventional—the chest/sleeve cutout!

Naomie HarrisBest Color: Naomie Harris. Mustard? I know! But it so works on her. This was also a close second for my most unconventional. I don’t understand the top, and I think that’s why I like it—almost like cobblestone. The bottom looks so light and silky, and if you caught my Golden Globes review, you’ll know I’m a fan of the high slit. Love the leg over the cleav! Also have to give her props on the soft curls.

Charlize TheronBest Neutral: Charlize Theron. One of the E! correspondents said it was reminiscent of Anne Hathaway at the Globes, but I disagree. Charlize isn’t pasty, and she works this fashionable Dior gown. I love the peplum—surprised we didn’t see more of the trend this season! And I’m not really a fan of the pixie cuts, but Charlize’s looks so spunky—a total badass bombshell.

Halle BerryJennifer HudsonBest Long Sleeves: Halle Berry. I originally chose Jennifer Hudson, who somehow made the scale-effect look attractive. Then I switched my vote. Halle said she asked Donatella Versace to make her look like a Bond girl, and she definitely achieved that creation. Even the shoulder-pad look couldn’t ruin this sparkly, streamlined gown.

AdeleBest Plus Size: Adele. Even though she didn’t vary from her Globes look (all black), this one again has a great fit, great length, great sleeves and it’s accompanied by the classic Adele ‘do and smoky eye.

Jane FondaBest Over 50: Jane Fonda. Clearly the boldest color on the carpet! I love the cut and how exquisitely it conveys her timeless beauty. Another celebrity whose short hair style I would say complements her appearance.

Corinne Bishop and Jamie FoxxBest Dressed (Who are you again?): Corinne Bishop. She’s Jamie Foxx’s daughter. In this picture, she looks like a scared kitten, but she was gorgeous on his arm. I love the teal color, the heart-shape neckline and the interwoven bodice. She may be one to watch in the future.

Sandra BullockDress I desperately want to fall in love with: Sandra Bullock. First off, I wanted to push her hair back behind her ear. Back to the dress—I initially hated it like most of her previous red carpet appearances. Then I had an internal tug-of-war. I like the fit on her and the black laciness; I don’t like the sheer bottom (reminds me of a negligee), and the purse should have been silver or black.

Nancy O'Dell Maria MenounosBest Dressed Host: Nancy O’Dell & Maria Menounos. There have been award shows in the past where I’ve detested almost every host’s gown; however, these two are almost always consistent with their picks. I swear Nancy gets younger every year, and did anyone wear a dress better than she did? I love the beautiful blue color and her strappy shoes. Maria also went with a bold brilliant color in a gown, and she is notorious for the high, voluminous hair.

Jessica ChastainBest Hair and Makeup: Jessica Chastain. I have a feeling she’ll get a lot of flack about her dress (again), but I thought it complemented her sun-kissed skin and auburn hair. Speaking of hair, it looked wavy and polished, and her makeup only made her look more gorgeous. I am also usually overly critical of the red lip (probably because I could never pull it off), and even with the red hair it doesn’t clash—it works!

Eddie RedmayneBest Dressed Man: Eddie Redmayne. Can you say ‘smoldering’?

Nicole Kidman and Keith UrbanBest Dressed Couple: Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban. These two took my breathe away. Nicole always brings the high fashion, and she has the perfectly well-coiffed man candy. Even Nicole’s hair looks so effortless.

WORST DRESSED LIST

Kerry Washington Rachel MwanzaWorst Dressed: Kerry Washington. Ok, it was an upgrade from the Globes. I do like the salmon color against her skin tone, but it’s the flowery bust, cheap, flat-pressed bow, and extra length that moved this to the worst dressed list. First time, though, that I didn’t want to actually pick one; although I would have defaulted to no-name Rachel Mwanza (no-name being irrelevant because she’s at the Oscars, and I’m unbathed, on my couch).

Sally FieldWorst Long Sleeves: Sally Field. The sheer red was just not working. The way it gathered made it appear like she has arm rolls. The other thing about this dress—if you put a petticoat under it, she could have been mistaken as coming character.

Melissa McCarthyWorst Plus Size: Melissa McCarthy. Typical—someone cut a whole in sheet and applied some sparkly appliques to pull it all together. What’s with the 80’s rocker hair?

Tabatha CoffeyWorst Over 50: Tabatha Coffey. Not sure who she is, Sinead O’Conner’s stunt double? I think she raided Jennifer Lawrence’s closet for a gown. She has no cleavage to work this dress, and the feathers and leather gloves clash.

Helen HuntWorst Steal: Helen Hunt. She got her dress from H&M, and it shows. It’s all crinkly and it looks very similar to my sophomore homecoming dress.  I get the feeling she just doesn’t care anymore.

Brandi GlanvilleWorst Dressed (Who are you again?): Brandi Glanville. I have no clue why she’s at the Oscars. A color would have helped this dress, but only slightly. To be honest, though, Brandi just chose the wrong dress. Her makeup is overkill, she’s too tan (even for Hollywood), and her boobs—what can’t I say about those things busting out of their tiny cup holders?

Salma HayekWorst Dressed (You should know better): Salma Hayek. Correspondents said she looked super-petite, but with her curves, that dress should have hugged her a little more. Instead the velvet fabric just hands there. Then there’s that horrid collar and awful tiara!

Amy AdamsWorst Dressed (I let my child pick out my dress): Amy Adams. I think this dress overwhelms Amy and definitely washes her out. Not sure if her kid is old enough to make fashion choices, but if she’s not, then that explains why she wore this.

Jennifer AnistonDress that everyone will probably love but I hate: Jennifer Aniston. Ok, you’re probably thinking “But you like Jennifer Lawrence?” Well, to be honest, I saw Jennifer’s ensemble and I liked it. She looks great in red, and she’s rocking the classic J. Aniston. Then I thought, this is the Oscars. Pull up your hair! As far as the dress, the length is too long, and the whole concept is too young—too Jennifer Lawrence. She also looks best in something more fitted.

Kristen StewartWorst Neutral: Kristen Stewart. At first I thought this gown was white, but I think it’s more of a dusty gold. Another example of a dress washing out its wearer! Plus, Kristen has a boyish figure, and this dress makes that clearly evident. I also cannot comprehend the use of tool at the bottom.

Kelly RowlandWorst Dressed Host: Kelly Rowland. This dress must have come from a contortionist. I feel like she’s about to flash us goods—top and bottom. Then there’s that hideous updo with those heavy bangs! I don’t know what Jamie Foxx sees in her (since he groped her on the red carpet).

Renee ZellwegerWorst Hair and Makeup: Renee Zellweger. The cryptkeeper has arrived! I don’t think gold’s her color, and it’s not that flattering on her figure. Unfortunately, this shot does not convey the utter disaster that is her hair and makeup. Inside the theater, her hair looked frizzy, and it seemed like she didn’t even apply makeup to disguise her gaunt eating disorder.

Jason SchwartzmanWorst Dressed Man: Jason Schwartzman. I thought it was Charlie Chaplin! The navy suit, droopy bow tie, oversized fit, 20’s slicked-back hair, and Chester-the-Molester ‘stache complete this horrifying ensemble.

Sunrise Coigney and Mark Ruffalo Lianne Spiderbaby and Quentin TarantinoWorst Dressed Couple: Sunrise Coigney and Mark Ruffalo. Her dress looks leathery on top with a poncho on the bottom, and his suit looks shiny, which highlights an apparent weight gain. I love Mark, but I think he’s had some medical problems, which makes him look 5-10 years older. I feel bad giving them this award, so check out Quentin Tarantino and Lianne Spiderbaby. He’s all disheveled, and she looks like she’s auditioning for a remake of Sound of Music. Plus, her deep V makes her look like a linebacker.

I also included a few other pics of stars whom I didn’t critique, so enjoy the gallery and let me know: Who was your best and worst dressed stars of the evening?

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And the best dressed award goes to…

Posted by emzkbd on February 26, 2012

The greatest night in film has arrived, as did numerous, luminous stars to the red carpet. Predictions suggested black would rule the celebrity runway, but white made an appearance in the right way. Here are my picks for the best and worst dressed at the 2012 Academy Awards!

BEST DRESSED LIST

Best dressed: Milla Jovovich.  Resident hottie! She’s never been to the Oscars and already she’s slayin’ it! I hope she steps out more often!

Runner up: Emma Stone.  I know everyone’s making comparisons to this dress  worn previously by Nicole Kidman, but the only real similarity is the bow. I love the touchable fabric, the way it flows and the brilliance of the color. Easy A+ in my book!

Best white: Gwyneth Paltrow.  I can’t stop thinking about this dress and how glamorous she looks! Sure, it has a cape, but she’s a total superhero at the Oscars. Guess she’ll have a View from the Top; maybe then her hair will come out of that awful low ponytail!

Best black: Angelina Jolie.  Even though she still looks like something a Tomb Raider would find (a.k.a. scary skinny), Angie can’t help looking uber-confident and crazy-sexy in this velvet-y black gown. She keeps it simple without any jewelry, which presumably slipped off when she was attaining that wildly seductive sex hair just moments before emerging from her limo!

Best color: Leslie Mann.  Such a gorgeous dress… makes her look 17 Again! Perfect combination of sleek and sparkly!

Runner up: Penelope Cruz.  She’s no stranger to ball gowns at awards shows, but tonight Penelope is a vision of old Hollywood. I give her a Nine out of 10!

Best plus size: Octavia Spencer.  Not sure if this is white, off-white, or cream, but who cares? It shines just like the Academy Award winner herself. Octavia has made excellent choices this season, and this dress exquisitely shapes her figure. She certainly needs no Help looking like a champ!

Best over 40: Meryl Streep.  No, I wouldn’t wear it, but this is Meryl! She looks so regal and statuesque, and surprisingly, the gold accessories don’t make her look like an Iron Lady.

Best host: Maria Menounos.  If this dress were metallic, it would be the color of the new car I want. Reminiscent of Mila in lavender last year! So romantic and ethereal!

Best couple: George Clooney and Stacy Keibler.  Looks like George already picked up his Oscar! Stacy has been one to watch this season, and tonight was no different. Her dress looks like liquid gold and complements her skin tone and hair color tremendously.

Best guy: Pharrell Williams.  Is this the guy that was responsible for the shitty sound at the Oscars? During the pre-show, he was labeled a music consultant. Either way, a good tailored suit makes it almost forgivable.

Most improved: Michelle Williams.  She always walks her own path when it comes to fashion, but not since her yellow fringe-y number have I loved one of her dresses so much! The coral color against her porcelain skin oozes a fruity flavor. My only issue is the fabric—it looks sorta starchy and itchy!

Most unexpected surprise: Cameron Diaz.  It’s clear I’m not on board with the nude color trend, but There’s Something about Cameron in this beige gown that makes me wanna be In Her Shoes!

Don’t love ‘em/don’t hate ‘em: Jessica Chastain , Rooney Mara , and Kristen Wiig . For Jessica, I think it was a little ornate, but the black and gold contrast was definitely Helped her standout. Rooney, on the other hand, had been The Girl hiding in black but instead chose an off-white number, which only made her made haircut more evident. Lastly, Kristen’s dress isn’t bad, but again, she chose a bad color I can only describe as the diarrhea from Bridesmaids. Not to mention, an up-do would have improved this look considerably.

WORST DRESSED LIST

Worst dressed: Berenice Bejo.  Redheads and navy dresses work! Redheads and seafoam green? Not so much! Berenice wore the deep blue at the Globes, but failed to stun this evening. Frankly, it looks like she’s caught in a net!

Runner up: Jennifer Lopez.  Jenny from the block has a look, and this is it—tantalizingly tight, splendidly sparkly, and a collage of cleavage and cut-outs. Unfortunately, this dress looks like an optical illusion. If you stare too long you might have a seizure! And can J.Lo rock any other hair style beside the top-knot?

Worst white: Shailene Woodley.  Not looking good for this up-and-comer! This dress looks like it was made for a blind person with the braille on chest! Furthermore, it’s just too matronly for this young Descendant. You’ll have plenty of time to look old, Shailene, so use this time to look fresh and fabulous!

Worst black: Anna Faris.  Love the hair, hate the dress! It’s no surprise long sleeves did not receive a high five at the Oscars. It looks like Anna added the missing pieces to Rose Byrne’s dress  and went with it.

Worst plus size: Melissa McCarthy.  Ok, ok, so the dress isn’t as horrific as Bridesmaids not winning an award, but she looks like she belongs in a tower, letting down her hair! Someone trying to live out a fairy tale?

Worst over 40: Melissa Leo.  Not even sure if this can be categorized as a dress? Obviously, someone doesn’t care unless she’s nominated.

Worst host: Kelly Osbourne.  The dress isn’t that bad, but I can’t take fashion advice seriously from someone with purple hair. That and she is such a proponent of spanx, but yet her dress looks too tight across her hips.

Worst guy: Matthew Lillard.  A. Where’s he been since Scream? B. Why does he look like a creepy serial killer? And C. why does his suit look a few sizes too big? Did he just come off Biggest Loser: Celebrity Edition?

Most unexpected disappointment: Sandra Bullock.  Just like Melissa Leo, a former Oscar winner should show ‘em how it’s done, right Gwyneth? Sandra’s dress is ill-fitting on top, even if it does present a scoop back. Not even the black and white could Blindside this dress into the best dressed category.

Runner up: Natalia Portman.  You, too, Natalie! As a Black Swan you should have blossomed, but instead you look more like a pregnant lady bug.

Now you know mine, so who were your favorites?

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Lookin’ SAG-gy

Posted by emzkbd on January 29, 2012

If the Golden Globes are the playoffs, then the Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards are… the Pro Bowl? Sure, why not? It’s all about actors giving other actors awards, just like the Pro Bowl is not quite the best (because they’re in the Super Bowl) of the best playing touch football. The SAG awards don’t have the anticipation of the Globes or the glam of the Oscars; they’re really just a filler between the two, as well as a reminder of which movies we should be seeing before the Academy Awards.

Coincidentally, I feel the same about the SAG red carpet. It’s not really about wearing your favorite gown of the season; sometimes celebs play it safe in black or change it up in a short cocktail dress. Of course, it’s still a place to spot some va-va-voom because those voomers are the ones who know not everyone has brought their A-list fashion. I’m looking at you, Naya Rivera.

So here is my breakdown of tonight’s red carpet extravaganza.

BEST DRESSED LIST

Best dressed: Sofia Vergara.  Am I becoming too predictable? Almost as much so as Modern Family winning the outstanding ensemble in a comedy series each year. It’s such a shame we won’t see Sofia’s curves on the Oscars’ red carpet. I think the fuchsia color is fabulous with her complexion, and I love how she accessorized with purple jewelry.

Runner up: Katrina Bowden.  Last time, I expressed my distaste with the nude, pale and white dresses, but here’s a girl with a newly-engaged glow Rockin’ a simple, chic frock.

Best black: Stacy Keibler.  I almost gave her my number one spot for this lacy number. Even though she’s only arm candy, she certainly knows how to steal the show. She’s my most anticipated celebrity to see at next month’s big top. No Cloon’in around!

Best color: Emily Blunt.  I think it’s safe to say she always walks the red carpet like a Queen. No, it wasn’t Prada, but her Oscar de la Renta gown was meant for the red carpet runway.

Best plus size: Octavia Spencer.  At first, I wanted to hate it, but the more I saw it, the more it worked for her. This woman clearly needs no Help working the red carpet, or winning an Oscar.

Runner up: Melissa McCarthy.  So maybe she’s not ready to take a risk when it comes to fashion, since she didn’t stray far from her GG dress (which ended up on my worst dressed list last time), but this time, things came together nicely for her. At least she didn’t show up looking like a Bridesmaid.

Best over 40: Viola Davis.  There’s not a Doubt in my mind that she, like Octavia, landed a great role and a great dress. The white color popped against her rich skin tone, and the beading at her bust line lent just the right amount of sparkle.

Runner up: Regina King.  Sure, it might have been a tad too young for her, but it was frilly and romantic. Plus we never see this color enough, and girl is fit as a fiddle. We’re way past Jerry Maguire, so it’s about time she shows us the money!

Best host: Maria Menounos.  Again, I think she upstaged her peers. Sorry, Kelly and Guiliana, but you two fashion police should be ticketed for not dressing more like Maria.

Best guy: Jim Parsons.  Definitely not a Hollywood hunk at one of these soirees, but he sure did a Bang up job with his tuxedo.

Most unexpected surprise: Kaley Cuoco.  I have a Theory that she and her fellow castmates are getting the hang of this red carpet thing. She’s never wowed me in the past; in fact, I think she’s shown up at previous awards shows looking like a hot mess. Personally I think the ball gowns and bridal couture look are more for the Oscars, but even so, I thought she looked like she climbed out of a fairy tale.

Runner up: Natalie Portman.  Honestly I would have expected to see her Anywhere but Here, but now that I have I’m in love with this burgundy number, the sash at the waistline and how amazing her boobs look post-pregnancy.

BATTLE OF THE GLEEKS

It’s no surprise the Glee girls are on everyone’s radar, and after some major faux pas at the GG’s, I’m sure I wasn’t the only one holding my breath for their next appearance as a fashion favorite or flop.

Here’s how they climbed my chart:

Heather Morris,  what were you thinking? The hair is so WT, the shoes and accessories don’t match, and the dress has too much going wrong—the different materials, the poor fit, and the leg drapery. Was your influence Britney or Madonna or both?

Amber Riley,  you’re one of my biggest disappointments because you always look great. However, this time, you’re also my worst dressed plus size. It looks like you tried to mate Emma Stone’s and Stacy Keibler’s dresses and wrap it up with a big bow. Never again or I’ll stuff you in the trunk of a Mercedes.

Jenna Ushkowitz,  you do know that you’re part of the Glee cast and not Modern Family’s, right? I get that this look is youthful and sparkly, but it would have been a better fit for MF’s Sarah Hyland or Ariel Winter.

Lea Michele,  I don’t think any dress was sexier, but you picked the wrong color (again). Any other color and this dress would have been a clear winner, a Rachel Berry must!

Dianna Agron,  I’m glad you chose something that really showed off your femininity, reminds me of Mila Kunis’ soft and flowy choices last season. Absolutely one of my favorites!

Naya Rivera,  you give Lea a run for her money. You’re a young, shiny J.Lo—full-on glamazon!

WORST DRESSED LIST

Worst dressed: Shailene Woodley.  As a newbie to the red carpet, she definitely put her worst dress forward. I realize the film The Descendants took place in Hawaii, but that doesn’t mean she should pay homage to the Hawaiian theme.

Runner up: Emma Stone.  I feel like she’s caught between vixen and girl-next-door. The cocktail length and flirty shoes are sweet, but the vampy black and sexy lace are spicy. Which is it, Emma? Naughty or nice?

Consolation prizes that were worthy (or not worthy?) of mention: Gretchen Mol  (a white and gold short-sleeved kimono), Jane Krakowski  (Xena: Warrior Princess’s black tie formalwear), Julianna Margulies  (this dress needs to see a doctor about its wart infestation), Kristen Wiig  (boring beige meet chocolate choker, now get out of my fashion nightmare), and Zoe Saldana  (guess someone finally netted that Columbiana).

Worst over 40: Meryl Streep.  For playing the Queen B of a fashion magazine, this Iron Lady has succumbed to the hot mess fashion line belonging to Diane Keaton.

Still can’t buy into the hype: Angelina Jolie.  The dress looks like liquid leather, the way it slithers down the red carpet. Is she a badass mother of six? Maybe. Or maybe she’s just covering up her bony bad ass. A trash bag could look sexier… or is that the simplistic look she’s going for?

Needs to find a new look: Jane Lynch.  Honestly, the style and color have been 9 of her last 10 dresses, or so it seems. Case in point…

Worst guy: Jonah Hill.  Congratulations, you’ve lost a ton of weight. Now why are you still dressing like your clothes don’t fit?

Tilda Swinton wannabe: Rose Byrne.  She’s too beautiful and presumably straight to go down the road of jumpsuits/pantsuits.

Most improved but still a Fash-ho: Julie Bowen.  It’s a better look than the last, but it reminds me of the curtains at a theater with the way it’s pinned up at her shoulders. I would say though that it’s the color that saved it from being a travesty. Arguably the “it” color for the show!

Don’t love it/don’t hate it: Michelle Williams.  I didn’t get the purple leopard print and the headband last time, and I still can’t accept the Valentino fitted frock with a little lace and a high-lo hem as a frontrunner. You’re a fashion conundrum to me, Michelle, but keep trying! One of these times you’re bound to be my (Blue) Valentine.

Tell me your SAG-gy faves and who you predict will stun at the Oscars. And as always, stay tuned for a re-cap on Bachelor Ben and his skinny-dippin’ ways.

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The Golden Globes—the playoffs to the Oscars

Posted by emzkbd on January 15, 2012

Here we are in the midst of the 2012 awards season, and already I’m underwhelmed with the performances and appearances. I’ll admit I haven’t seen most of the nominated films, so I only have myself to blame. However, there aren’t many films that pique my interest, maybe The Help, The Girl with the Dragon Tatoo (which I’m almost finished reading), and Young Adult; the rest, either I’ve seen ‘em or I’ll leave ‘em. And as far as TV shows goes, I already have a full lineup on my DVR, and unfortunately I must not have very good taste according to the Hollywood Foreign Press because most have not been included in this soiree.

So since I can’t speak to the nominees (yet), I’ll keep my opinions to the red carpet. My biggest gripe—the abundance of blush, nude and gray walking the celebrity runway. BORING!! I’ve said it a thousand times, show up in jewel tones and you won’t be forgotten. It’s like all these ladies are publicizing their desire to pose for playboy. Show us a pop of color somewhere besides your lips and nips! Sometimes one or two of them does it right, but most of the time, I’m loving the dress but wishing it were in a different color.

Then there are the black and white, chain mail metallic, and my-body-is-a-canvas trends. Everyone has their niche or their chance to go bold, but I can’t say that any of these choices WOW-ed me this year. Kate Winslet and Claire Danes played it safe in their penguin-inspired dresses, but both failed to leave an impression. Next up, Nicole Richie parades onto the red carpet (excuse me, why?) in something that appears to belong under a suit of armor. And finally the Glee girls (Lea Michele and Dianna Agron) apparently thought this was some sort of living art expo. Lea, Halle Berry already rocked this trend, and Dianna, the swan thing is creepy on top and your g-ma’s doilies are hideous on the bottom.

Without further ado, here is my Best/Worst Dressed list for the 2012 Golden Globes.

BEST DRESSED LIST

Best dressed: Sofia Vergara. So the dress wasn’t radical or unpredictable. She knows how to work her curves, and it shows. This dress fit like a glove, just like Nicole Kidman’s,  but for Nicole, it’s all about finding a color to complement your features, and gray is not that. So, no, Nicole is not really part of my Best Dressed.

 Most Glamorous: Jessica Alba. For just having a baby, she looks stunning! The dress is very romantic and begs to be touched.

 Most Unconventional: Salma Hayek. The beading, the shimmer, très chic! I feel like she’s been missing from the red carpet, and I’m happy to see she’s returned.

 Best Color: Paula Patton. Good morning, Sunshine! This woman is the next Sofia Vergara, who coincidentally, also went with a fishtail dress.

 Best Blush/Nude: Kate Beckinsale. I know I said I hated this trend; I’d take the fishtail over this one any day. But like I said, every once in a while, someone (with the right features) does it right, and this time it was Kate.

 Runner-up: Charlize Theron. Again, I didn’t want to like it, but I recognize that she always takes a fashionable risk with the style of her dress, and it usually works. Plus, her porcelain skin still allows the blush color to standout just a bit.

 Best Long sleeves: Laura Dern. I loved this emerald color, too, but I think this was perfect for the carpet and a GG winner. Just wish she had a little more makeup!

 Best Plus Size: Amber Riley. So not all the cast of Glee made a mistake. Amber did it right last year, and I think she comes out on top again this year! Great color (it’s tough when you’re competing with the carpet) and very complimentary for her curves!

 Best Over 50: Helen Mirren. Always! This woman has aged well and knows what works. Ruffles done right!

Runner-ups (over 40):

 Viola Davis. Talk about a silent favorite. I had to check her age and realized she wasn’t “over 50” but I still thought she deserved credit for dressing sexy as hell at her age.

Felicity Huffman. Shimmering in a creamy gold number, she turns 50 this year, but she certainly isn’t a Desperate Housewife. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find a picture.

 Best dressed (Who are you again?): Jenna Dewan. Reminiscent of Mila Kunis last season, I love this style and the color. Not enough green this year! (Speaking of Mila Kunis—yes, I know who she is,  but I have to point out the reason she didn’t make my “list.” Black is safe, and this style seems so as well. After last season, this just doesn’t even come close to movie-star quality.)

Runner-ups:

 Berenice Bejo. She’s the French silent film star. That almost sounds naughty. Either way, I loved her dress, and I can’t wait to see what she wears to the Oscars.

Stacy Keibler: Yes, you’re George Clooney’s girlfriend now, but where will you be next year? Hopefully, making more red carpet appearances.

 Dress I desperately want to fall in love with: Julianne Moore. I love the layers here, but I’m still trying to wrap my head around the tiers at the hips and the feet.

 Runner-Up: Evan Rachel Wood. There’s a lot going on here with the sparkle, the scales, and the feathers, but I want to say she wears it well.

 Best Dressed Host: Nancy O’Dell. I know I said the chain mail look was out, but she pulls off this metallic look elegantly.

 Best Dressed Man: Chris Colfer. I almost wish he were straight.

WORST DRESSED LIST

 Worst Dressed: Piper Perabo. It looks like she has no boobs, the color is depressing, and it looks like she’s got the Wringling Brothers under that big top.

 Runner-Up: Naya Rivera. Perhaps the worst dressed Glee star, I had to mention how dreadful her dress was. This gray at least had more depth to it, but the turtleneck-like collar and the unsightly seam down the middle made it unsalvageable.

 Worst Blush/Nude: Elle MacPherson. From the weird wings on top to the explosion of tulle at the bottom, it’s red carpet trash. Thank goodness she has great hair!

 Worst Long Sleeves: Jessica Biel. Has someone already started to look at wedding dresses?

 Worst Plus Size: Melissa McCarthy. I hate saying this because I know how cool she is, but it’s just so wrong, like a bejeweled robe. And then there’s the Snooki poof!

 Worst Over 50: Glenn Close. It looks like a mother-of-the-groom dress, and we all know how wretched those can be.

 Worst Dressed (You should know better): Heidi Klum. I tried to find the fashion sense here with the turquoise jewelry, which I like, but I just can’t give this ensemble the credit it probably deserves.

 Worst Dressed (I let my child pick out my dress): Sarah Michelle Gellar. Aww how cute! Your daughter helped pick out that mistake. Looks like you wrapped yourself in a drop cloth and let someone throw a bucket of blue paint on you. Obviously you have no fashion sense and neither does your child.

 Worst Dressed (all of them with cap sleeves): Yes, I’m looking at you—Emma Stone in your belted Greek priestess gown; Julie Bowen in that horrific retro nude catastrophe; and Madonna, you’re not SJP, so don’t try to be trendy chic at these events for real actors.

 Worst self film-promotion: Rooney Mara. I was in her corner for most of her film premieres, but this is too much. Lay off the black and put some more color in your wardrobe!

 Dress that everyone will probably love but I hate: Reese Witherspoon. The material looks cheap, the fit is too tight in some parts and too loose in others, and the hem is way too long. Great beachy hair though!

 Runner-Up: Angelina Jolie. Sorry, I just can’t get behind this. I know I’ve seen this color combo before (wasn’t it Natalie Portman last year), and while the slit and shoes are sexy, it’s just not my cup of Blood and Honey (that was her movie reference).

 Worst Dressed Host: Giuliana Rancic. I think she needs to take time to heal from this dress.

 Worst Dressed Man: Jesse Tyler Ferguson. Uh, hello, I thought you were gay in real life?

There were lots more that I failed to mention. For more pics, I recommend a visit to People.com (where I found most of these shots). Tell me, who did you think was a hit or a miss?

And stay tuned for tomorrow’s Bachelor re-cap.

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