(Pop) Culture Shock

It comes in waves

And the best dressed award goes to…

Posted by emzkbd on February 26, 2012

The greatest night in film has arrived, as did numerous, luminous stars to the red carpet. Predictions suggested black would rule the celebrity runway, but white made an appearance in the right way. Here are my picks for the best and worst dressed at the 2012 Academy Awards!

BEST DRESSED LIST

Best dressed: Milla Jovovich.  Resident hottie! She’s never been to the Oscars and already she’s slayin’ it! I hope she steps out more often!

Runner up: Emma Stone.  I know everyone’s making comparisons to this dress  worn previously by Nicole Kidman, but the only real similarity is the bow. I love the touchable fabric, the way it flows and the brilliance of the color. Easy A+ in my book!

Best white: Gwyneth Paltrow.  I can’t stop thinking about this dress and how glamorous she looks! Sure, it has a cape, but she’s a total superhero at the Oscars. Guess she’ll have a View from the Top; maybe then her hair will come out of that awful low ponytail!

Best black: Angelina Jolie.  Even though she still looks like something a Tomb Raider would find (a.k.a. scary skinny), Angie can’t help looking uber-confident and crazy-sexy in this velvet-y black gown. She keeps it simple without any jewelry, which presumably slipped off when she was attaining that wildly seductive sex hair just moments before emerging from her limo!

Best color: Leslie Mann.  Such a gorgeous dress… makes her look 17 Again! Perfect combination of sleek and sparkly!

Runner up: Penelope Cruz.  She’s no stranger to ball gowns at awards shows, but tonight Penelope is a vision of old Hollywood. I give her a Nine out of 10!

Best plus size: Octavia Spencer.  Not sure if this is white, off-white, or cream, but who cares? It shines just like the Academy Award winner herself. Octavia has made excellent choices this season, and this dress exquisitely shapes her figure. She certainly needs no Help looking like a champ!

Best over 40: Meryl Streep.  No, I wouldn’t wear it, but this is Meryl! She looks so regal and statuesque, and surprisingly, the gold accessories don’t make her look like an Iron Lady.

Best host: Maria Menounos.  If this dress were metallic, it would be the color of the new car I want. Reminiscent of Mila in lavender last year! So romantic and ethereal!

Best couple: George Clooney and Stacy Keibler.  Looks like George already picked up his Oscar! Stacy has been one to watch this season, and tonight was no different. Her dress looks like liquid gold and complements her skin tone and hair color tremendously.

Best guy: Pharrell Williams.  Is this the guy that was responsible for the shitty sound at the Oscars? During the pre-show, he was labeled a music consultant. Either way, a good tailored suit makes it almost forgivable.

Most improved: Michelle Williams.  She always walks her own path when it comes to fashion, but not since her yellow fringe-y number have I loved one of her dresses so much! The coral color against her porcelain skin oozes a fruity flavor. My only issue is the fabric—it looks sorta starchy and itchy!

Most unexpected surprise: Cameron Diaz.  It’s clear I’m not on board with the nude color trend, but There’s Something about Cameron in this beige gown that makes me wanna be In Her Shoes!

Don’t love ‘em/don’t hate ‘em: Jessica Chastain , Rooney Mara , and Kristen Wiig . For Jessica, I think it was a little ornate, but the black and gold contrast was definitely Helped her standout. Rooney, on the other hand, had been The Girl hiding in black but instead chose an off-white number, which only made her made haircut more evident. Lastly, Kristen’s dress isn’t bad, but again, she chose a bad color I can only describe as the diarrhea from Bridesmaids. Not to mention, an up-do would have improved this look considerably.

WORST DRESSED LIST

Worst dressed: Berenice Bejo.  Redheads and navy dresses work! Redheads and seafoam green? Not so much! Berenice wore the deep blue at the Globes, but failed to stun this evening. Frankly, it looks like she’s caught in a net!

Runner up: Jennifer Lopez.  Jenny from the block has a look, and this is it—tantalizingly tight, splendidly sparkly, and a collage of cleavage and cut-outs. Unfortunately, this dress looks like an optical illusion. If you stare too long you might have a seizure! And can J.Lo rock any other hair style beside the top-knot?

Worst white: Shailene Woodley.  Not looking good for this up-and-comer! This dress looks like it was made for a blind person with the braille on chest! Furthermore, it’s just too matronly for this young Descendant. You’ll have plenty of time to look old, Shailene, so use this time to look fresh and fabulous!

Worst black: Anna Faris.  Love the hair, hate the dress! It’s no surprise long sleeves did not receive a high five at the Oscars. It looks like Anna added the missing pieces to Rose Byrne’s dress  and went with it.

Worst plus size: Melissa McCarthy.  Ok, ok, so the dress isn’t as horrific as Bridesmaids not winning an award, but she looks like she belongs in a tower, letting down her hair! Someone trying to live out a fairy tale?

Worst over 40: Melissa Leo.  Not even sure if this can be categorized as a dress? Obviously, someone doesn’t care unless she’s nominated.

Worst host: Kelly Osbourne.  The dress isn’t that bad, but I can’t take fashion advice seriously from someone with purple hair. That and she is such a proponent of spanx, but yet her dress looks too tight across her hips.

Worst guy: Matthew Lillard.  A. Where’s he been since Scream? B. Why does he look like a creepy serial killer? And C. why does his suit look a few sizes too big? Did he just come off Biggest Loser: Celebrity Edition?

Most unexpected disappointment: Sandra Bullock.  Just like Melissa Leo, a former Oscar winner should show ‘em how it’s done, right Gwyneth? Sandra’s dress is ill-fitting on top, even if it does present a scoop back. Not even the black and white could Blindside this dress into the best dressed category.

Runner up: Natalia Portman.  You, too, Natalie! As a Black Swan you should have blossomed, but instead you look more like a pregnant lady bug.

Now you know mine, so who were your favorites?

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2 Responses to “And the best dressed award goes to…”

  1. Kait said

    You never disappoint! What did you think of viola!? Loved her!

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