(Pop) Culture Shock

It comes in waves

Lookin’ SAG-gy

Posted by emzkbd on January 29, 2012

If the Golden Globes are the playoffs, then the Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards are… the Pro Bowl? Sure, why not? It’s all about actors giving other actors awards, just like the Pro Bowl is not quite the best (because they’re in the Super Bowl) of the best playing touch football. The SAG awards don’t have the anticipation of the Globes or the glam of the Oscars; they’re really just a filler between the two, as well as a reminder of which movies we should be seeing before the Academy Awards.

Coincidentally, I feel the same about the SAG red carpet. It’s not really about wearing your favorite gown of the season; sometimes celebs play it safe in black or change it up in a short cocktail dress. Of course, it’s still a place to spot some va-va-voom because those voomers are the ones who know not everyone has brought their A-list fashion. I’m looking at you, Naya Rivera.

So here is my breakdown of tonight’s red carpet extravaganza.

BEST DRESSED LIST

Best dressed: Sofia Vergara.  Am I becoming too predictable? Almost as much so as Modern Family winning the outstanding ensemble in a comedy series each year. It’s such a shame we won’t see Sofia’s curves on the Oscars’ red carpet. I think the fuchsia color is fabulous with her complexion, and I love how she accessorized with purple jewelry.

Runner up: Katrina Bowden.  Last time, I expressed my distaste with the nude, pale and white dresses, but here’s a girl with a newly-engaged glow Rockin’ a simple, chic frock.

Best black: Stacy Keibler.  I almost gave her my number one spot for this lacy number. Even though she’s only arm candy, she certainly knows how to steal the show. She’s my most anticipated celebrity to see at next month’s big top. No Cloon’in around!

Best color: Emily Blunt.  I think it’s safe to say she always walks the red carpet like a Queen. No, it wasn’t Prada, but her Oscar de la Renta gown was meant for the red carpet runway.

Best plus size: Octavia Spencer.  At first, I wanted to hate it, but the more I saw it, the more it worked for her. This woman clearly needs no Help working the red carpet, or winning an Oscar.

Runner up: Melissa McCarthy.  So maybe she’s not ready to take a risk when it comes to fashion, since she didn’t stray far from her GG dress (which ended up on my worst dressed list last time), but this time, things came together nicely for her. At least she didn’t show up looking like a Bridesmaid.

Best over 40: Viola Davis.  There’s not a Doubt in my mind that she, like Octavia, landed a great role and a great dress. The white color popped against her rich skin tone, and the beading at her bust line lent just the right amount of sparkle.

Runner up: Regina King.  Sure, it might have been a tad too young for her, but it was frilly and romantic. Plus we never see this color enough, and girl is fit as a fiddle. We’re way past Jerry Maguire, so it’s about time she shows us the money!

Best host: Maria Menounos.  Again, I think she upstaged her peers. Sorry, Kelly and Guiliana, but you two fashion police should be ticketed for not dressing more like Maria.

Best guy: Jim Parsons.  Definitely not a Hollywood hunk at one of these soirees, but he sure did a Bang up job with his tuxedo.

Most unexpected surprise: Kaley Cuoco.  I have a Theory that she and her fellow castmates are getting the hang of this red carpet thing. She’s never wowed me in the past; in fact, I think she’s shown up at previous awards shows looking like a hot mess. Personally I think the ball gowns and bridal couture look are more for the Oscars, but even so, I thought she looked like she climbed out of a fairy tale.

Runner up: Natalie Portman.  Honestly I would have expected to see her Anywhere but Here, but now that I have I’m in love with this burgundy number, the sash at the waistline and how amazing her boobs look post-pregnancy.

BATTLE OF THE GLEEKS

It’s no surprise the Glee girls are on everyone’s radar, and after some major faux pas at the GG’s, I’m sure I wasn’t the only one holding my breath for their next appearance as a fashion favorite or flop.

Here’s how they climbed my chart:

Heather Morris,  what were you thinking? The hair is so WT, the shoes and accessories don’t match, and the dress has too much going wrong—the different materials, the poor fit, and the leg drapery. Was your influence Britney or Madonna or both?

Amber Riley,  you’re one of my biggest disappointments because you always look great. However, this time, you’re also my worst dressed plus size. It looks like you tried to mate Emma Stone’s and Stacy Keibler’s dresses and wrap it up with a big bow. Never again or I’ll stuff you in the trunk of a Mercedes.

Jenna Ushkowitz,  you do know that you’re part of the Glee cast and not Modern Family’s, right? I get that this look is youthful and sparkly, but it would have been a better fit for MF’s Sarah Hyland or Ariel Winter.

Lea Michele,  I don’t think any dress was sexier, but you picked the wrong color (again). Any other color and this dress would have been a clear winner, a Rachel Berry must!

Dianna Agron,  I’m glad you chose something that really showed off your femininity, reminds me of Mila Kunis’ soft and flowy choices last season. Absolutely one of my favorites!

Naya Rivera,  you give Lea a run for her money. You’re a young, shiny J.Lo—full-on glamazon!

WORST DRESSED LIST

Worst dressed: Shailene Woodley.  As a newbie to the red carpet, she definitely put her worst dress forward. I realize the film The Descendants took place in Hawaii, but that doesn’t mean she should pay homage to the Hawaiian theme.

Runner up: Emma Stone.  I feel like she’s caught between vixen and girl-next-door. The cocktail length and flirty shoes are sweet, but the vampy black and sexy lace are spicy. Which is it, Emma? Naughty or nice?

Consolation prizes that were worthy (or not worthy?) of mention: Gretchen Mol  (a white and gold short-sleeved kimono), Jane Krakowski  (Xena: Warrior Princess’s black tie formalwear), Julianna Margulies  (this dress needs to see a doctor about its wart infestation), Kristen Wiig  (boring beige meet chocolate choker, now get out of my fashion nightmare), and Zoe Saldana  (guess someone finally netted that Columbiana).

Worst over 40: Meryl Streep.  For playing the Queen B of a fashion magazine, this Iron Lady has succumbed to the hot mess fashion line belonging to Diane Keaton.

Still can’t buy into the hype: Angelina Jolie.  The dress looks like liquid leather, the way it slithers down the red carpet. Is she a badass mother of six? Maybe. Or maybe she’s just covering up her bony bad ass. A trash bag could look sexier… or is that the simplistic look she’s going for?

Needs to find a new look: Jane Lynch.  Honestly, the style and color have been 9 of her last 10 dresses, or so it seems. Case in point…

Worst guy: Jonah Hill.  Congratulations, you’ve lost a ton of weight. Now why are you still dressing like your clothes don’t fit?

Tilda Swinton wannabe: Rose Byrne.  She’s too beautiful and presumably straight to go down the road of jumpsuits/pantsuits.

Most improved but still a Fash-ho: Julie Bowen.  It’s a better look than the last, but it reminds me of the curtains at a theater with the way it’s pinned up at her shoulders. I would say though that it’s the color that saved it from being a travesty. Arguably the “it” color for the show!

Don’t love it/don’t hate it: Michelle Williams.  I didn’t get the purple leopard print and the headband last time, and I still can’t accept the Valentino fitted frock with a little lace and a high-lo hem as a frontrunner. You’re a fashion conundrum to me, Michelle, but keep trying! One of these times you’re bound to be my (Blue) Valentine.

Tell me your SAG-gy faves and who you predict will stun at the Oscars. And as always, stay tuned for a re-cap on Bachelor Ben and his skinny-dippin’ ways.

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